There are times that the route taken to a destination doesn’t matter as long as you get there. Like when you are going on a vacation. Even though you may have spent two hours lost on the way, once you get there you forget all about it. Mommy hood is the destination. How I get there really doesn’t matter to me. Am I saying that I don’t want to have biological children? No, I’m not saying that. Honestly I don’t know. That is an issue I need to spend some time exploring within myself. However, I do know that babies coming into my home and heart by way of another’s tummy doesn’t bother me.
For the past two weekends I have been taking classes to be certified as a foster-to-adopt parent. This is an avenue I am pursuing alongside my Russian adoption journey. Mandatory classes are often dreaded and approached with a sense of “Ah, man why do I have to do this thing.” And State mandated education? Ya, we are talking boring-ville right? I expected to spend 27 hours propping my eyelids open and faking an interested face while my brain went soft.
Well, I could not have been more wrong! This class was taught by two of the most passionate, caring, educated, people I have ever met on this journey. Superb! I was expecting monotone dialog accompanied by endless PowerPoint conducted by people who never made eye contact and who would certify anyone with a heartbeat to care for these children….WRONG! These people were articulate, energetic, funny, and knowledgeable. The standard they hold for foster parents and the expectations they have are so high. I learned so much about this process and was put in touch with many resources for the future.
I learned a lot about the foster to adopt system in my state. I learned the term, programs, processes etc in my state. There is much more to learn but at least I know the basics. It truly is a mission and a gift to be able to be there for children at that point in their lives. Despite the issues with behavior, aggression, academics, emotional acting out, being a knowledgeable and compassionate foster parent is a gift that lasts a lifetime.
Perhaps the most important connection that was made this weekend was with one of the instructors. She also teaches and conducts classes in a variety of other topics including Grief recovery. Life can be a challenge and every one of us has had to or will have to deal with loss at some point. Dealing with these losses in a healthy way can heal your heart and make you a more effective parent…person. I look forward to participating in this new journey.
We will see where the crooked road goes from here. But, it was so wonderful to climb into my car and drive the two hours home knowing that I had just met a divine appointment. I was actually supposed to pass this junction, this road sign on my way to my destination…
